Dear Bad Client,
I am writing in order to inform you of my decision to give you the sack.
It has been far too long that I have put up with your underpriced, little, miserable projects. I understand that we are living in an era of bad economy and you also try to survive this situation, but so am I and so I am done! Why do you insist on paying me per word for projects less than 250 words? I have a flat rate for these little ones! You should respect it! And on top of that, after each of these little ones, why do you keep asking for a freebie that counts more words than the actual project? I am a translator, not a saint!
I do understand that you are a very busy person and a human being, so please do try to comprehend that I am also a very busy person and a human being. Your deadlines are not humane. I still need to sleep and eat and go to the loo! When you expect to have your project delivered yesterday, then I am sorry but I cannot help you. I also do not appreciate it when you sent me incomprehensible instructions or countless of emails and you are badgering me to change my mind and accept your deadline, lower my rates to suit your needs and understand your countless excuses for not paying for my services! Are you a large shark?
Please, explain something to me: why is it that I have always to deliver on time and it is hell to pay even if I deliver just a couple of minutes late, when it takes you more than a month after the 30 days-payment agreement and I have to remind you that you owe me for a particular project? How would you feel if you had to call and email your clients in order to get the payment for the services you have provided? Have you got used to feel like a beggar?
One final question: why do you not reply to my emails? It may be that you are busy but I still have a deadline to meet (one you have set!) and since I am sending you the email, it does mean that I need your advice, not that I have nothing better to do with my time. A reply after waiting for two days is simply not acceptable!
For all the above mentioned reasons, you are the worst of my clients: GOODBYE!
I wish you all the luck for the future!
Your Former Translator